


Deserving is half the battle

by yarrie



Series: If love was a place (we'd be walking the path less traveled by) [2]
Category: Digimon Frontier
Genre: Choking, F/M, M/M, Not in a sexy way, OR IS IT, Polyamory, Takuya discovers a latent pain kink, These two things are not related but they do coexist in a complicated way, mention of past abusive relationship, unassuming confession of undying love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-17
Updated: 2019-02-17
Packaged: 2019-10-30 04:01:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17821484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yarrie/pseuds/yarrie
Summary: Kouji laughed, short and bitter. "Do I look okay? Don't answer that.""You look beautiful, as always," Takuya said carefully, like he would to a cornered wild animal. Kouji had...issues. He had issues about his issues, even. Some days he would be all dark humor and self-deprecating jokes, and others he would snap that he wasfine, really, stop bothering me,but on the worst days he would go soft and quiet like he was afraid of drawing attention to himself. Izumi knew more of the story than Takuya did, but what he did know made his blood boil. He was pretty sure that they were only holding back because they knew he'd end up doing something painful (and illegal) to Kouji's ex-boyfriend.Kouji laughed again—a little longer, a little less bitter. "Why thank you."





	Deserving is half the battle

**Author's Note:**

> Because I can never leave well enough alone, here's another installment in my poly!Takouzumi verse, featuring a wiser, more sexually adventurous Takuya and his not-just-maybe boyfriend who, as it turns out, is a Hot Mess in more than one way. I wanted to include Izumi, but I also wanted to keep it short, so...next time!

When Takuya came home, the first thing he did was grab Kouji from behind for a hug. This was not a good idea, primarily because Kouji had a black belt in judo and did not react well to being surprised. There were other reasons too—Kouji's unfortunate relationship history, Takuya's careless strength—but the judo thing was the reason they ended up on the hardwood floor with Kouji on top, arm under Takuya's chin. 

In any other context Takuya would've categorized this position as a 4/10 on the sexy scale. In this particular moment, it fell between a 7 and an 8, if only because Kouji was actually incredibly attractive when he was showing off what his body could do. Even half-starved for oxygen, though, Takuya's brain recognized that this was a  _really_ unfortunate way to discover this particular kink and there was _no way_ he could bring it up right now. Kouji would give him that little scandalized look and Izumi would get curious and Takuya would blurt everything out and Izumi would laugh at them forever and Kouji would refuse to indulge Takuya on principle. Either way, Takuya resolved to never, ever grab Kouji from the back again—unless it was in a very specific, pre-negotiated context that would never happen unless he got Kouji to stop choking him pretty fucking soon. "Baby," he gasped out, "can you let go of me?"

With a quiet hiss of alarm, Kouji did let go. Sort of. His arm was still looped under Takuya's chin, but at least he was no longer actively blocking Takuya's airflow. "What the hell, Takuya," he said, blinking down at him with a baffled stare. "You know better than to surprise me."

Takuya groaned, because he really should know better—he did know better, most of the time. "I forgot. I'm sorry." He rubbed his neck, grimacing.

"Yeah, I'll bet you're sorry now." Kouji readjusted his grip and let his arms loop loosely around Takuya's shoulders, splaying his hands over Takuya's chest. "Me too," he murmured. And he did look rather sorry, by Kouji's standards anyways.

Not really knowing what to do, but needing to do _something_ , Takuya rubbed Kouji's neck after he was done with his own. "I just wanted to hug you," he admitted, exceedingly embarrassed now.

Kouji tilted his head forward over the rumpled mass of Takuya's hair to meet his eyes. "Oh, is that all?" he snorted softly. "Here. Have a hug."

Takuya groaned. "No, no, not—I wanted to—here." He sat up and repositioned their bodies until Kouji was practically flat on the ground. "Like this." He wrapped his half-boyfriend up, pressing Kouji's face into his soft red nylon jacket. It was still a little damp from the cold and snow, but he didn't think Kouji would mind.

Kouji made a surprised but not displeased sound. He settled against Takuya's chest, wrapping his arms around him. "What's gotten into you, Takuya?" he asked, muffled by the jacket.

Takuya huffed. "Whaddaya mean?"

"You don't usually come barging into the kitchen just to hug me," Kouji pointed out, with a questioning lilt to the words.

"Oh." Takuya flushed and fidgeted, not sure how to begin.

Blue eyes peeked at him from under the curtain of Kouji's dark hair. "Well?" he prompted.

"Well, I saw...your ex today," he said finally, because Izumi would probably tell Kouji anyways, and he knew that Kouji would rather hear it from him first.

Kouji went so tight and rigid that he might as well have turned to stone.

Takuya suddenly felt extremely glad that he managed to get them into this position before he blurted out the reason for it. "Kouji," he said, before stopping to consider his next words. Izumi really would have been better at this part. Takuya could do the whole hug-for-comfort thing, but he was absolutely no good with words.

Kouji's hands slowly clenched into fists on Takuya's back. "He's back in town?" he said finally.

Takuya nodded slowly. "Visiting family, he said. You okay?"

Kouji laughed, short and bitter. "Do I look okay? Don't answer that."

"You look beautiful, as always," Takuya said carefully, like he would to a cornered wild animal. Kouji had...issues about his issues, sometimes. Some days he would be all dark humor and self-deprecating jokes, and others he would snap that he was _fine, really, stop bothering me,_ but on the worst days he would go soft and quiet like he was afraid of drawing attention to himself. Izumi knew more of the story than Takuya did, but what he did know made his blood boil. He was pretty sure that they were only holding back because they knew he'd end up doing something painful (and illegal) to Kouji's ex-boyfriend.

Kouji laughed again—a little longer, a little less bitter. "Why thank you."

"And it's not—it's not that you don't look okay," Takuya added, moving back to the issue at hand. "I just figured you'd want some warning in case you ran into him at the store. Or something." Izumi had been convinced that Yoshida would leave Kouji alone, but Takuya wasn't banking on it. It had been absolutely infuriating to hear him talk about Kouji as if they had been perfect together. What kind of person asked how his ex-boyfriend was handling their breakup when said breakup had happened two years ago? What kind of person expected his ex-boyfriend to keep pining after all that time?

"...I'm not going to hide out here just because he's back," Kouji said very quietly. "I have a life to live. He's not part of it, and he's not going to take it from me."

Kouji was obviously speaking more to himself than anything, but Takuya responded anyways. "Yeah, but nobody would blame you if you wanted to avoid seeing him, okay? Nobody." He nuzzled his nose into Kouji's hair.

Kouji sighed. "Thank you for telling me."

"Of course. Anytime." He suppressed the urge to ask Kouji what he had seen in a man as small-minded as Yoshida. Kouji wouldn't want to hear it—not right now. Maybe not ever. "You know that I love you, right?"

Kouji flinched.

"I do," he said firmly, realizing that if there was ever a good time to keep pushing the l-o-v-e issue, it was now.

It felt like forever before Kouji nodded. "Yeah...I know."

"Okay. As long as you know." Takuya kissed him very, very gently on the forehead. Kouji probably didn't even realize it was a kiss, not with the way he was buried into Takuya's clothes.

"And to think," Kouji muttered, sounding more like his usual self, "without me, you could've gone your whole life thinking you were straight." He said it like the very concept offended him. 

"I _am_ straight," Takuya said, more for the sake of argument than anything.

Kouji knocked him on the shoulder with the side of his fist, laughing, and it actually hurt but not in a bad way—and yeah, okay, they were definitely going to have to talk about his growing fascination with Kouji and pain, but that was a conversation for another time. For now, this quiet moment in the kitchen with Kouji curled up against him was more than enough. 


End file.
